Her fingers move softly over the ivory keys of her piano. Reminding me once more to find value in the essence of each moment...this woman who gave birth to my soul many years ago and yet delights in my very being. "Oh what a beautiful morning" gently caresses my listening ears while sitting in my pajamas I know it is time to get dressed and face the day ahead. "Oh what a beautiful day"...a day in which to be still in the knowledge of the gifts I have to experience, all the while knowing this life will one day pass and a new beginning will be mine for eternity!
Sweet memories of days gone by travel the path to my heart, full of happy laughter and ice cream bars, poolside fun along with the most delicious food you can imagine having before you. Children laughing in the water while sunbeams fall upon their tender skin. This life we took for granted and yet somehow treasured at the same time. I see now how quickly it passes before we know it. Gentle hugs and goodbyes, waving from the car to happy moments with giggling girls in the back seat filled with summer treasures.
And here we are, together for this day filled with sunlight and hope. While typing this morning as I enjoyed a cup of coffee, the sun poured in across the transom window in the living room causing me to move three times to avoid the light in my eyes! What a bother it seemed to be until I stopped to see the value in the moment. No matter what may befall us in this life we call ours, the light still finds us
when we least expect it to shine...
And so, while the morning is new and my thoughts are fresh, I pause to give thanks for everyday I spend in hopeful anticipation of all He has in store for me to behold with tender eyes of faith. Quiet treasures from his holy word fill my heart with gladness even in grief. Age may consume us, problems befall, heaven awaits me, worth it all! Death calls the weary, life here will end, knowing the future will be with HIM!
Today is a treasure I hold in my heart. Somehow these days of grief provide me with a closer walk with my creator. "You are such a deep thinker" my Momma said to me yesterday. Much like my earthly Daddy who had strong arms of love and compassion and who would have moved heaven and earth to protect me. His bible, worn from study always sat on the nightstand unless he was reading it...quietly underlining the important days of our lives...each occasion documented for our most priceless remembrance after he went to be with Jesus!
Romans 8:38-39 reads:"For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, neither angels nor demons,
neither present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Jesus Christ our Lord." And so it is. This life worth living with eternity to treasure. Amen.
Tuesday, September 15, 2015
Saturday, September 12, 2015
Sweet reminders of a life to come in the glory of friendships and hope!
She called today to check on me...her heart full of compassion on this day one year to the date of my husbands home going to new life in heaven. My friend of nearly thirty years in which we have faced all matter of trials and joy together! She never forgets to share love and her joyful ways gift a smile to my heart. We are so close, it is as though God knew we would need each other for a lifetime. My sister of sorts on this road called life. We met at Sunday School too many years ago to count and the moment I heard her exclaim "for true" I knew she must be from home. A true Louisiana girl whose husband would become Dan's dearest friend, and she mine!
The happy chatter we share is clearly a matter of having so much in common. Even though we have lived in different states for awhile our families are bonded with memories and plans for the future. We have invested ourselves in the lives of each other. Our goals include sharing our faith and loving our families and grandchildren. Most importantly our faith in God gives hope to our days, and joy in the knowledge of being sisters in Christ forever. Many tears have fallen between the two of us as life has unfolded in a way neither heart could have faced without this faithful bond in Christ. It is good to be loved.
Many others have encouraged me as I faced the loss of my husband whom they also knew and loved. He was a man of few words but when he loved you he gave his heart for life. So many plans fell to the side while cancer slowly caused our lives to change and our faith to grow more than we could have ever understood without the journey we traveled together. Encouraged by his faith Dan looked forward to his heavenly home. One day there would be a glorious reunion much like the most precious of celebrations we have ever known.
So, today which started with coffee and Jesus is not so much a sad time, but instead a day in which I say thank you...to the many friends who have gently helped to guide me along this path of grief and shared their own journey and testimonies of how God always held them up when the waves of sorrow
swept the tides of change forevermore. You see, this is not the end, but the beginning for those who are in Christ! New starts are adventures in trust and promise...God never disappoints his children.
And today I celebrate the birthday of our handsome grandson Robbie who we love dearly as a family. I can't help but smile each time he hugs me in the same way his Grandpa did...a heart filled with gentle caring ways. We shared so many childhood moments with he and his beautiful sister Kristi. God knew we needed joyful times to balance the times in which bittersweet memories would keep us close at heart. A heritage of faith and hope continues to guide me along this daily God given life I call mine.
Life is good and life goes on a friend once told me...and so it does. Psalms 118:24 Reads: This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.
The happy chatter we share is clearly a matter of having so much in common. Even though we have lived in different states for awhile our families are bonded with memories and plans for the future. We have invested ourselves in the lives of each other. Our goals include sharing our faith and loving our families and grandchildren. Most importantly our faith in God gives hope to our days, and joy in the knowledge of being sisters in Christ forever. Many tears have fallen between the two of us as life has unfolded in a way neither heart could have faced without this faithful bond in Christ. It is good to be loved.
Many others have encouraged me as I faced the loss of my husband whom they also knew and loved. He was a man of few words but when he loved you he gave his heart for life. So many plans fell to the side while cancer slowly caused our lives to change and our faith to grow more than we could have ever understood without the journey we traveled together. Encouraged by his faith Dan looked forward to his heavenly home. One day there would be a glorious reunion much like the most precious of celebrations we have ever known.
So, today which started with coffee and Jesus is not so much a sad time, but instead a day in which I say thank you...to the many friends who have gently helped to guide me along this path of grief and shared their own journey and testimonies of how God always held them up when the waves of sorrow
swept the tides of change forevermore. You see, this is not the end, but the beginning for those who are in Christ! New starts are adventures in trust and promise...God never disappoints his children.
And today I celebrate the birthday of our handsome grandson Robbie who we love dearly as a family. I can't help but smile each time he hugs me in the same way his Grandpa did...a heart filled with gentle caring ways. We shared so many childhood moments with he and his beautiful sister Kristi. God knew we needed joyful times to balance the times in which bittersweet memories would keep us close at heart. A heritage of faith and hope continues to guide me along this daily God given life I call mine.
Life is good and life goes on a friend once told me...and so it does. Psalms 118:24 Reads: This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.
Wednesday, September 9, 2015
Living as a widow in a married world...learning to walk the path God has given me.
It seemed easy enough to fill my otherwise simple day with joyful anticipation of things to come. Somehow I could not make the connection between what was necessary and what was important. You see, this was the day I was to pack my car with treasures and take off for the sunset of better days. Only circumstances kept me from the trip I had planned. It was as if God held a mirror to my heart and typed in the words: be still. Willing or not it would have to be another day.
This new life of making decisions without the strong gentle voice of my dear husband to guide and care for me in the wake if uncertainty, haunted my day. September 12 is drawing near...the anniversary of his departure to heaven. I sat for a talk with my wise and loving Momma who assured me I was coping well in spite of missing him. So many details had to be taken care of before I could safely take a step forward without him. Being widowed in a married world is a conflict of life lessons.
You see, I was able to feel safe in the knowledge that my husband was always here for me...his strong arms of love provided me with an anchor of love to hold to. I was his and he was mine until the end of time, or so we thought. The one who loved me as a nineteen year old girl and walked me into the wiser years of life. I wonder if the treasure is not in the number of years, rather in the depth of the love we shared. Maybe one day I will understand the plan God has destined me to live from this day forward.
Jesus is my safe and loving guide each and every day. Even with the struggles of life I can truly say I am blessed beyond any dreams I had growing up. Life is a forward path in which we learn to love and treasure each gift we are given. Perhaps the truth is, others will learn to love more deeply as a result of the testimony of faith we offer in each day the good lord chooses to afford us. My deepest hope is to share the incredible journey my father in heaven has chosen to fashion with love for me...in order that others may come to know the awesome love of God, so freely offered to each willing heart.
Sometimes the wisest of souls are the very ones we give birth to! Our children light up my heart with the music of love and they remind me to give thanks to my savior for giving me pieces of Dan's heart here on earth. Soon we will celebrate our grandson's birthday and recall how proud his grandpa was of the man he has become. Oh it is good to give thanks to the Lord for he alone knows our every need. Yes, be still and know that he is God. He is the giver of all things...let us rejoice!
This new life of making decisions without the strong gentle voice of my dear husband to guide and care for me in the wake if uncertainty, haunted my day. September 12 is drawing near...the anniversary of his departure to heaven. I sat for a talk with my wise and loving Momma who assured me I was coping well in spite of missing him. So many details had to be taken care of before I could safely take a step forward without him. Being widowed in a married world is a conflict of life lessons.
You see, I was able to feel safe in the knowledge that my husband was always here for me...his strong arms of love provided me with an anchor of love to hold to. I was his and he was mine until the end of time, or so we thought. The one who loved me as a nineteen year old girl and walked me into the wiser years of life. I wonder if the treasure is not in the number of years, rather in the depth of the love we shared. Maybe one day I will understand the plan God has destined me to live from this day forward.
Jesus is my safe and loving guide each and every day. Even with the struggles of life I can truly say I am blessed beyond any dreams I had growing up. Life is a forward path in which we learn to love and treasure each gift we are given. Perhaps the truth is, others will learn to love more deeply as a result of the testimony of faith we offer in each day the good lord chooses to afford us. My deepest hope is to share the incredible journey my father in heaven has chosen to fashion with love for me...in order that others may come to know the awesome love of God, so freely offered to each willing heart.
Sometimes the wisest of souls are the very ones we give birth to! Our children light up my heart with the music of love and they remind me to give thanks to my savior for giving me pieces of Dan's heart here on earth. Soon we will celebrate our grandson's birthday and recall how proud his grandpa was of the man he has become. Oh it is good to give thanks to the Lord for he alone knows our every need. Yes, be still and know that he is God. He is the giver of all things...let us rejoice!
Friday, September 4, 2015
Resting in the pillow of his unfailing grace...finding hope in the goodness of tomorrow.
The day started quietly...after plugging in the coffee pot I stumbled through the early morning moments I call precious. Be it ever so quiet, I love those (just woke up and the entire day is before me) kind of moments. There is a delightful sense of anticipation within my heart and a desire to make good use of the time set aside for my morning devotions. Safe and waiting on my coffee table are my bible and devotional books along side my prayer journal. A pencil and highlighter and oh yes, the ever present dictionary which keeps me from having to pretend I can actually spell while composing my blog.
Years ago I could never have guessed I would find myself in the midst of a huge life change called widowhood. Prayer has become the lifeline to which I cling! Day after day, week after week my time spent in God's precious word fuels my ever growing desire to know my heavenly father more. This God who hung the stars and caused ocean to roar, pauses to meet with me...his ever changing creation. I wonder sometimes if it is possible in this earthly lifetime to comprehend the vastness of His love? Certainly the opportunities to grow in faith are endless. Maybe the desire meet with him is my souls quest for true peace. That which writers claim passes all understanding!
In conversation recently I heard a friend say they would not know how to keep going in life were it not for their faith. My heart agrees in harmony with this truth. My husband was always willing to listen to my ponderings on hope and dreams, and to urge me on when in my humanness I felt ill equipped to maneuver this stage called life. The trials of an ever changing set of circumstances caused me to feel defeated and tired of the endless challenges ahead. It was easy to feel discouraged and tired. "Everything will be just fine, you wait and see. God has never let you down before" he would say and hug me ever so tightly in his gentle way.
Dan led my heart to trust and learn to believe in the goodness of tomorrow. He wanted to live so badly that he was willing to do most any treatment which offered him hope. I asked him many times if he ever felt like giving up the fight to which he replied the same response...as long as there was hope for a cure or even the slightest chance he might live longer he would find it within himself to keep going. What a testament to the power of the human spirit to seek hope in the midst of unthinkable pain and suffering. And yet he did it for love.
There are many seasons in which we find ourselves in need of hope. Even in the midst of deep pain and heartache, there is a tiny voice within telling us to keep in mind the open door which leads to better days to come. God knows our deepest fears and challenges. He is not surprised when we cling to hope with all the power within us. Many times the heart finds rest within the pillow of his almighty grace. 'Where do I go, oh where do I go? Needing a comfort for my soul? Needing a friend who's with me to the end. Where do I go but to the Lord!' The author and finisher of our faith. Come Lord Jesus...the best is yet to be.
Years ago I could never have guessed I would find myself in the midst of a huge life change called widowhood. Prayer has become the lifeline to which I cling! Day after day, week after week my time spent in God's precious word fuels my ever growing desire to know my heavenly father more. This God who hung the stars and caused ocean to roar, pauses to meet with me...his ever changing creation. I wonder sometimes if it is possible in this earthly lifetime to comprehend the vastness of His love? Certainly the opportunities to grow in faith are endless. Maybe the desire meet with him is my souls quest for true peace. That which writers claim passes all understanding!
In conversation recently I heard a friend say they would not know how to keep going in life were it not for their faith. My heart agrees in harmony with this truth. My husband was always willing to listen to my ponderings on hope and dreams, and to urge me on when in my humanness I felt ill equipped to maneuver this stage called life. The trials of an ever changing set of circumstances caused me to feel defeated and tired of the endless challenges ahead. It was easy to feel discouraged and tired. "Everything will be just fine, you wait and see. God has never let you down before" he would say and hug me ever so tightly in his gentle way.
Dan led my heart to trust and learn to believe in the goodness of tomorrow. He wanted to live so badly that he was willing to do most any treatment which offered him hope. I asked him many times if he ever felt like giving up the fight to which he replied the same response...as long as there was hope for a cure or even the slightest chance he might live longer he would find it within himself to keep going. What a testament to the power of the human spirit to seek hope in the midst of unthinkable pain and suffering. And yet he did it for love.
There are many seasons in which we find ourselves in need of hope. Even in the midst of deep pain and heartache, there is a tiny voice within telling us to keep in mind the open door which leads to better days to come. God knows our deepest fears and challenges. He is not surprised when we cling to hope with all the power within us. Many times the heart finds rest within the pillow of his almighty grace. 'Where do I go, oh where do I go? Needing a comfort for my soul? Needing a friend who's with me to the end. Where do I go but to the Lord!' The author and finisher of our faith. Come Lord Jesus...the best is yet to be.
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